I've been thinking about life and goals and patterns and routines and things like that, and especially about the ways in which control exists in our lives as individuals. There's so much of our lives that we can't control and it's so weird to know that living your happiest and best life is about knowing how tight to hold onto different things, and knowing how to be swept along by change. I love the idea of time travel, going back to 1996 and being me (then) before I was me (now). I dream about alternate realities that I've made myself, filled with white horses and fireflies. I dream about heaven and afterlife and magic and mysticism in secret pockets in my life because I need an escape from the lack of power sometimes. And then dreams become so big and so plentiful that they become their own kind of power.
Dreams are a kind of magic, whether they are impossible fantasies or real goals. If you aim for number one and you end up number seven, well, you got a number. And maybe you'll realise that you like the shape of a seven better after all. I fill myself with more and more dreams all the time, and the more dreams I carry, the more I feel that I'm turning into a dream too. There's an acceptance of myself within the creation and acceptance of endless possibility.
I want to do and be so many things and so many ideas. I want to travel and drink wine in different countries. I want to speak German and master every complicated plait and cute plait-related hairstyle in existence. I want to see Depeche Mode perform live. I want to high five Dwayne Johnson. I want to sing a duet with Dodie Clark, Tori Kelly, or Bruce Springsteen. I want to make someone laugh until they cry. I want to have picnics and watch sunsets. I want to draw comics for magazines. I want to paint the biggest painting in the world. I want to have adventures - even if an adventure is just scribbling a sun and eating a strawberry.
Life is best when you aim for every fantastical dream and live for the beauty and adventure in wherever you land. Life is best when you can find the tiny adventures in every crack of the road.