I wanted to make really simple scans this week to just exist and remember I exist. I always find all the natural hues of these scans so soothing. Here I am like a careful painting or a sleeping sculpture, all brown and white and pink and yellow, all earth and blood. Sometimes writing here is hard because I'm too conscious of it. It's not the diary of streamed thoughts I want it to be. Existing is a bit like that I think. I think about things, my life, whatever, and I get this stuck feeling. It's a strange feeling which goes away when I see the moon or am in public and feel small. then I remember I'm alive and that's a thing that exists on it's own, before anything else. I'm just an alive and existing thing small and separate from everything around me. Sometimes that's really important to remember. I exist and it rains hard and mini donuts exist also, that's quite good.