I've been being even more messy and collagey and barely conscious in my diary entries and I wonder if posting the more personal things is wise. Mostly I find that reading the personal stuff again is like reading the words of a completely different person and I find it embarrassing and weird but I think it's important to look at this stuff and be okay with it. I need to understand the multitude of old selves to fully understand my current self, maybe. I don't want to transition without paying attention to transition. Making it a tool, I suppose, rather than being passive about all the old me ghosts. The me ghosts tried their best, after all.
I think this diary has been an important way of letting those me ghosts drift off but at the same time offering them a cuddle and telling them it was all okay. And with the help of this little ghost gang I have gathered, I can do my best to make things okay in the future, and understand better when things aren't okay. Thanks ghosts.
On an unrelated note, I have recently been enjoying the words "school" (as used to refer to universities) and "skeevy."
|I like the inspiring words on the moon - they were from an interview with Niki & The Dove in the June 2012 issue of The Fly|
|The words in red are things Julian Barratt says in the wonderful 90s comedy Asylum|
A little bit of a future diary page: